I want wake up one day and get faith. I want to be wildly optimistic and accepting of my path. I want to be able to have a direct line that that thing that it that entity that lives in me that I catch peripheral glimpses of when I’m playing with my nephew or laughing with my friends, or holding someone’s hand while they are dying, or comforting someone who has lost. That stillness. That sureness that what I’m doing is right.
I want the faith in me and my abilities that others have. It’s as if there is another Stacey Rose that I can feel just there in the shadows but who disappears when I turn to look her in the eye. I want to be emotionally and spiritually self sufficient. I want the well wishes and compliments of others to accentuate a knowing that I already have instead of being the foundation for what I know and believe about me.
Don’t try to sell me on religion, cause I ain’t buying. Every spirit speaks in a different tongues, and mine just happens to be multilingual. Just pray, in whatever way you do, that I find it.